SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Any Waywards who has to start over after failed R?

Well, sort of. In year three I found out my husband was having his own affair. So I feel like we had to start over.

This board has limited long term members these days. In my time here I can only think of a few scenarios that would fit here. One couple divorced and remarried. I am uncertain if you are asking if they have started their lives over? We have had quite a few that did divorce, though I am not sure I have seen many of those members in a long time.

Tell us a little more about what you are trying to figure out. Sorry I have been the only one primarily responding to you. In recent times the board is getting more active but with more newbies.

Yes, started their lives over. I haven’t found many examples even on Reddit, seems for the Wayward that life rarely gets better after!

It’s probably hard to find because most waywards have moved on and no longer post. I ca assure you that you have as much capability to go on and grow, heal, and come into some self compassion as any other person out there.

I can assure you we have had wayswards who divorced here who are no longer here but they have given updates at some time or another that they were doing well. In some cases, some of them even left toxic bs’s and starter back to school and did all sorts of things. There was a gal here for the first few years I was here who tried to twist herself into a pretzel to reconcile with her husband. He was a raging alcoholic. She left, and reported being happier than she had ever been.

You haven’t ruined your life. I can understand how dark it feels for you right now. You have made some bad decisions, as have I. But the possibilities for peace and love and happily ever after is still there. Transitions are hard, please do not give up on yourself. Do you have the ability to go to therapy or have people in your life to lean on?

A few great books:

"When things fall apart" by Pema Chodron

"Rising strong" by Brene Brown

"The power of now" by Eckhardt Tolle.

When you have enough posts you will be able to dm here, if you need someone to talk to I will be right here.

[This message edited by hikingout at 10:02 PM, Friday, June 13th]

Thanks for the book reccomendations. I wouldn’t say my BP is toxic so I wouldn’t be able to start anew with a somewhat ‘clear’ conscious. I’m pretty broken and don’t think I’ll ever recover to who I used to be, my BP seems to have been ‘strengthened’ by it all. I will post my fully story in a new post to give clearer picture!