Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 6:42 PM on Saturday, May 27th, 2017
fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!
You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~
minusone ( member #50175) posted at 12:05 AM on Saturday, June 3rd, 2017
"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:12 PM on Thursday, June 8th, 2017
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:22 PM on Monday, June 19th, 2017
Again - this is so much better than the original 180, IMO
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
Faith12345 ( member #59277) posted at 10:37 PM on Monday, June 19th, 2017
I absolutely love this post.
I've been going through this for about 2 months
After doing a soft 180- husband came back & said he didn't want to lose me. Unfortunately I was SO desperate that I let him back in right away. I wanted him near me so I could sleep next to him at night.
That was wrong because he just ended up lying and he ended up leaving again because he was caught red handed. (He still lies about every single detail even though I have proof)
Now I've decided to do a hard 180 because I'm not quite ready to file divorce. I feel like it's just too much stress on me and I need to wait a little while. Until then, hard 180 will keep me from being manipulated by his lies. I plan to just basically fall off of the face of HIS earth. Bc being around him is toxic for me (arguing, lies, blame shifting, GAS LIGHTING)
I decided that I really have to let him go and say that I'm done and as far as I'm concerned we are over. He's made his decision based on his actions (living with OW.. although he lies about it)
& I have to make mine by removing myself from his life. From now on when he picks up our kid I might just say "hello" & not leave my front door. I usually walk her to the car & that is where the small talk begins. No more of that.
No more arguing or talking period.
minusone ( member #50175) posted at 12:08 PM on Friday, June 23rd, 2017
"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou
minusone ( member #50175) posted at 8:01 PM on Monday, July 17th, 2017
"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou
MadOldBat ( member #44146) posted at 10:28 AM on Tuesday, July 18th, 2017
Keeping my chin(s) up whilst getting divorced.
Lovingmyselfmore ( member #46119) posted at 8:12 PM on Saturday, August 5th, 2017
dday: september-12-2014
Me: 42 EX: 46 gay or bisexual (go figure!) together: 12 years
Dday to 3 months: suicidal 1 year after: huge depression- 1.5 years still kind of depressed-Took me 2.5 years to be kind of happy again
minusone ( member #50175) posted at 12:24 PM on Friday, August 18th, 2017
"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou
Jen ( member #26584) posted at 12:35 PM on Monday, August 21st, 2017
Me former Booger Bear ...
https://youtu.be/1TcLw3TOIN8
Hand Me Down MatchBox 20
https://youtu.be/iFdOAyyn76M
Love Falls by HellYeah
Jen ( member #26584) posted at 11:09 PM on Sunday, September 17th, 2017
Me former Booger Bear ...
https://youtu.be/1TcLw3TOIN8
Hand Me Down MatchBox 20
https://youtu.be/iFdOAyyn76M
Love Falls by HellYeah
BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 7:31 AM on Friday, September 22nd, 2017
Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)
**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **
Skan ( member #35812) posted at 4:43 PM on Saturday, September 23rd, 2017
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
D-Day, June 10, 2012
MadOldBat ( member #44146) posted at 11:41 AM on Saturday, October 7th, 2017
Just pushing this excellent post by Ser JR back up to the top.
I really think that this would be so helpful as part of the Healing Library.
Strength SI-friends
MOB
Keeping my chin(s) up whilst getting divorced.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:56 PM on Wednesday, October 25th, 2017
Bumping - I think this is much clearer than the standard 180 document. We owe a lot to SerJr.
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 5:35 PM on Sunday, November 19th, 2017
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 5:30 PM on Saturday, December 2nd, 2017
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 8:53 PM on Thursday, December 7th, 2017
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 1:57 AM on Monday, December 11th, 2017
fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!
You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~
